Library (Lie-berry)

I've been working at my local Civic Centre recently, and on my lunch break I have been known to frequent the adjoining library for use of their computers. During these half-hour periods (yeah I only take a half-hour lunch. It's a matter of personal preference) I've noticed that the exact same people are there every single day, banging away on the computer keyboards. Consequently, I have been led to ponder as to what the fuck they're doing on the computers every single time and why none of them appear to have jobs. One of the regulars, who shall hereby be referred to as Mr. Comb-Over coz he's got an obscene comb-over, always has a rucksack with him and he jabs at the keyboard so hard you would think he had a personal vendetta against it. Due to my mind craving for some excitement after the previous hours I have spent staring at Microsoft Excel, I've come to the conclusion that he murdered his wife (who is in the rucksack) because she kept rinsing him for his shitty comb-over (think Bobby Charlton timesd by a million) and he keeps going on the computers to try and locate a decent dumping ground by searching on Google. He's probably hitting the keyboard so hard because he's so nervous about searching for a dumping ground for corpses.
I've also seen this cold-blooded killer in my local Wetherspoons, where no-doubt he often openly brags about how he murdered his wife.
"Oh yeah?" asks the other Harrow Wetherspoons regular who looks like Santa Claus. (He really does.)
"Yeah. She's in my rucksack."
"Well why did you bring it with you?"
"What?"
"You should've just left it at home, why did you bring it to the pub, and to the Civic Centre library?"
"....Well I'm not sure actually..."
"You mug, I'm gonna call the police, it'll serve you right for being such a shit murderer," threatens Santa, retrieving his 3310 from his pocket.
"Aw nah Santa don't, don't be out of order!" Mr. Comb-Over pleads, tustling with Santa for the phone. During the brief scrap Mr. Comb-Over's comb-over starts flapping around wildly and begins to look much more like a strand of sea-weed.
"I was only joking," Santa says and puts his phone back.
"Yeah well I didn't even kill my wife anyway, Kirk made the entire story up because he was bored in his lunch-break."
"Cor...you just went and broke the fourth wall, you did."
"I never!"
"You bloody did, you interrupted the course of the fictional narrative with information that our characters would have no way of knowing. You broke the fucking fourth wall."
"Yeah well so what, what's the fourth wall ever done for me?"
Anyway, of course there are plenty of other regulars at my Civic Centre library on the computers, but he looked the funniest so I thought I'd just talk about him.
But yeah have you ever noticed how library sounds like lie-berry? Might be something to look into.