Does anyone else think that more of an effort should be made by the government to discipline and just generally keep an eye on ghosts? I mean, who else do we just give the lee-way to to hang around in old houses and just terrify whoever comes inside? If anybody else did this the council would certainly get involved and make an attempt to put a stop to it. It's squatting, for one thing.
"Excuse me, Mr. Ghost? This is the Harrow Council, we've had some complaints about you terrifying people. If you don't own this building you have no right to do that."
"Boooooo!"
"Excuse me?"
This would be the point when the social worker would summon the two massive strong men to their aid and the ghost would be escorted from the premises.
"What are you doing? I used to live here when I was alive!"
"Mr. Ghost such an intangible argument simply won't hold sway in the court of law. We're placing you under arrest for disturbing the peace."
Turns out the ghost had a proper hard life as well so he's generally a hard-done-by sort. He used to get tripped over by bullies at school all the bloody time.
"This is an outrage!" he'd bellow with his ghostly lungs, but the two council brutes wouldn't listen and throw him in the fucking slammer for the rest of his after-life.
Wouldn't that be fucking shit? If it turned out there was an afterlife but you spent it all in fucking prison.
But yeah, that's what should happen to ghosts. It's only fair.
Saturday, 21 November 2009
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